“Women have to stay at home, have to cook, and clean the house and of course take care of the children. In contrary, their husbands are obliged to bring money into the family and to be the protector of it.” Let’s be honest. These kind of views about the exact role of the two sexes in the society, are obsolete.
It is clear to everyone that the gender roles are mixed. But the majority of men have not even found their new role. Traditional patterns are on the march, but also modern ones are not popular.
Ok. We live in a society where everything changes and everything moves. Everyday life is more demanding, the rhythms more fast and the demands grow. What about the roles of the sexes? Are stereotyped concepts still changing or still prevalent?
By entering women more actively in the workplace, leaving a little to the limit and limiting the prospect of family formation, men negotiate their role.
The traditional role of the man-wearer seems to pass through a “crisis”. Now, it seems that the woman also contributes financially to the house. So what will he do? Anxiety, afraid and maybe angry. How will he be useful to his family?
The role of the men in the past
A few decades ago, the roles were still clearly defined. The man went to work, the woman took care of the home. When women were attacked, men jumped in as protectors and saved the day.
According to researchers: “The man’s progress from the past to the present, will find a remarkable hereditary effect on his character, behavior and personality. All this comes from its natural strength. Human society has been built through the insecurity of the dangers of the natural environment, with unique protection the men’s physical strength. The demands of each era, were to make the man rely on this physical skill, which gave him an effortless role as a hunter, warrior, leader, ruler, leader and family lover. Every historical society confirmed in its own way – wars, conflicts, political events – that special role of the man.
The role of the men nowadays
In the last century, people have emerged mainly through the media and other aspects behind the shadow of man’s hardness: the family man, the father, the romantic guy, the gentleman. There are also many socio-economic changes, which has shaken males’ and also the females’ identity. It is inevitable, moreover, when a member moves to the system, to not move any other associated thing with it.
Today, most experts agree, that the patriarchy is as good as dead, at least in the European countries and also in America. In the course of the feminist debate, women have struggled in the past decades, to break down their traditional social role and to be treated as well as the men. They made a career. They did sports. They opted for an alternative lifestyle away from children, from cooking food and stuffing stockings. They conquered spheres which previously belonged entirely to the masculine. And that is absolutely and completely legitimate. They are able to do everything they want.
Today the women go to work, bring the food to the table, and could probably break mine bones if necessary.
Psychologists warn: “Men lose their identity – provider and protector? Nope!
A lot of men, leaving behind their taboos, are being treated with a request to negotiate their role. They feel “blurred”, desperate, without aim and with difficulty of direction. It cost them that the woman has gained power and may be afraid to lose the strong position they hold in society, but also the attention of the surrounding people.
Now, we see men staying home, helping the household and the most positive of all, they seem to create better relationships with their children. They want to spend quality time, because they may be seeing the necessity of their presence for children.
Scientists said about it: “Perhaps social changes and ongoing developments may have a positive outcome in changing the role of the man. He asks for help because he seeks usefulness and attention. It helps, strengthens and is compatible. Initially, he is afraid of the changes, but knowing their necessity, he is committed to following the evolution. The most important thing is to decide to see changes, to look for his new identity and to see that: “it depends on him.”
The scientists continued: “Its role has been determined by the context. Man’s position at work, in society and in relationships, is moving, and that is the result of the socio-economic change. The fist, the power, the absolute power that society has so far based on, have given way to trust, cooperation, perception, communication, elements that the man does not possess, because he simply hadn’t learned it.”
In order to see his role, he must gain access to the unconsciousness of the unconscious and to commit himself to it. Nobody said it is easy, but effort and willpower are able to lead to a positive shift.
“During the feeling that the control is lost from him, he finds it difficult to determine his own life and at the same time to be helpful for his environment. He begins to feel vulnerable, addicted and ashamed. He turns the lens toward himself, thinking that he is not enough in his job, disoriented by the role he knew to work individually, competing and to be a winner,” said Psychologist Pischos.
Taboo themes for him, like the stereotypes that he will lose his identity, if he comes in contact with his female features, a phrase that has placed a tombstone on the expression of man’s emotions and has trapped him in a cage, from which he doesn’t want to come out.
But people forget that there are no male and female feelings, there are human emotions that need to be expressed. And to be honest, in fact a woman cannot act without the man and a man is still a half person without a woman beside him. The two sexes have to support and complement each other!